We all have 2 core needs growing up and how they were met by your care takers may be impacting how you’re able to show up in your business.
The two core needs we have as children are for Attachment & Authenticity and if ever forced to choose only one of them, out of survival, we will abandon our true selves in order to please others and keep our relationships, even if they are toxic or destructive.
So how does this tangibly impact your business?
Let’s unpack both of these a little more in depth.
First, we need…
Secure Attachment
Again, this is something we need at the core just to simply survive as infants.
Secure attachment as a child looks like “I care about you and I’m here to protect you. You are perfect exactly as you are and you don’t need to change.”
I’ve had my fair share of challenges with my parents growing up, especially after I started to wake up to who I truly am and it’s been a process over years of deep inner work for me to fully process the emotional blockages I had as a child and understand as an adult now that my parents did the absolute best with what they had.
Trauma is past down generation after generation on a cellular level and on a behavioral level, so how your parents raised you was simply a reflection of how they were raised. If your parents have done deeper healing of their own traumas, than they unconsciously passed those on to you through how they showed up for you.
When you don’t have secure attachment, your nervous system learns to live in protection mode and habitually creates a life and mindset of scarcity because it’s constantly seeking safety in what you may be perceiving as a very unsafe world.
A few ways this can show up energetically in your business is through…
•Perfectionism
•Procrastination
•Not feeling good enough
•Believing you need to take every client, even when you know they aren’t the best fit
•Blocked in taking action
•Insecurity
•Not investing in yourself
•Fear of raising your prices
Second, we need…
Authenticity
We will abandon our authenticity if forced to choose because this simply allows us to thrive, where as any kind of attachment, secure or not, would at least keep us surviving.
Authenticity is growing up in a household where things weren’t kept from you, where people could express and share their emotions openly and where vulnerability was encouraged and celebrated.
Authenticity as a child looks like… “You are free to express yourself in whatever way you desire and your feelings are valid”
When your authenticity needs aren’t met we learn to sacrifice ourselves for others, leaving us in a state of victim consciousness.
A few ways this can show up energetically in your business is…
•People pleasing
•Lacking discipline
•Not trusting yourself
•Indecisiveness
•Overthinking
•Inconsistency
•Lacking focus or direction
•Struggling to share yourself publicly
•Client codependency
Facing your trauma is not easy but it’s incredibly worth it and one of the key ways to start to begin healing from your trauma is through safe relationships. Finding someone or a community of individuals whom you can fully show up as yourself with and know you won’t be judged.
This is in part why I run my Mastermind the way I do, because learning how to grow your business also includes feeling safe to do so and having not just education around strategy but also practices, support and training to help you become a more self aware person. That’s what this is all about.
Building a business is simply a path of deep self discovery and when you consciously choose to do the inner world work alongside the outer world work, you get the results you desire far more effectively, efficiently and sustainably.
Want to know more about the Mastermind and whether it’s a community you would thrive in? CLICK HERE to learn more and I hope we have the opportunity to connect soon.
